New Reviews

Blood Drive: “The F…ing Dead” (S1; E5)

Wait. Did I just watch a hot chick pump a giant phallus of orange goo onto a crowd of zombies? This show is great.

Blood Drive Episode 5 Review

Director: Roel Reiné
Stars: Alan Ritchson, Christina Ochoa, Thomas Dominique, Marama Corlett, Colin Cunningham

Our cast of creeps are having a hard time keeping it in their pants his week.

Grace and Arthur have Julian Slink cuffed in his Club Mayhem dressing room. The heroes are determined to learn Grace’s sister’s location–and Slink knows the answer.

You see, Grace found a old photo at Kane Hill sanitarium that included Slink. How he was a doctor in 1957 and the Blood Drive creator now is yet to be revealed. Now she’s convinced he had something to do with her sister’s disappearance.

But their interrogation becomes more complex when the Club Mayhem crowd outside starts chanting for entertainment only Slink can provide. Somebody better do something quick.

High above the crowd a sickeningly sweet set of twins, Jack and Diane, survey the crowd. They’re at Mayhem for one reason only: to find Julian Slink and get revenge. Slink had something to do with the destruction of their town and the death of their parents. Now they only have each other. Although they’ve never had each other, but that’s only because they haven’t  let their hair down like so many in their town.

Grace needs more time to work on Slink, so Arthur dons the top hat and steps on stage. Too bad his good cop routine hasn’t prepared him for a life in the theater. They hate him. That is, until he gets down and dirty with the crowd.

Speaking of dirty…

The twins mistake Arthur for Slink and set their plan in motion by putting the moves on he crowd. Apparently they are carriers of the Dionysus Strain, a deadly disease that turns the afflicted into single-minded creatures desperate for sex. Doesn’t sound too bad? Maybe not at first, but these bacchanalian beasts don’t stop. They fuck…to death.

Slink promises to get Grace the information she wants if she finds the antidote to the Dionysus Strain. This shouldn’t be too hard, as they are right next to the laboratory that first created the strain.

Meanwhile, the twins have found the real Slink and are more than ready to turn the lights out.

Can Grace and Arthur save the day? Will Slink escape the incestuous infected? Only if they can keep their baser instincts under control.

The plot is thickening (see what I did there) over at HEART Enterprises, too. Chris’ new eye is finally revealed. It’s definitely an upgrade, but it comes with a price–a price that will take more than 900 years to pay off.

Chris may be stuck in the system, but at least he’s taking advantage of his time on the inside. It’s not long before he discovers the “Hall of Secrets,” but he’s going to need a security upgrade to get any further. Maybe Aki can be persuaded? Guess we’ll find out next week.

I loved Roel Reiné’s direction on this episode. From the mid-century opening vignette to the PSA’s explaining the Dionysus Strain, there was a distinct visual style reminiscent of dystopian video games like Fallout or BioShock. The style is perfect for the modern grindhouse story. I hope we see a return of this look in future seasons (*fingers crossed for future seasons*).

Rating: 4/5

Photo courtesy of SyFy.

About Adrienne Clark (69 Articles)
Adrienne Clark is a writer, editor, and musician living in Seattle. She writes about pop culture around the internet and specifically about all things spooky at When not writing, she can be heard playing with indie dance band Killer Workout. She's a firm believer that every day is Halloween.

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