Blood Drive: “Booby Traps” (S1; E6)

Get it. It says “boobie.”

Director: Roel Reine
Stars: Alan Ritchson, Christina Ochoa, Thomas Dominique, Marama Corlett, Colin Cunningham

This week, ladies and gentleman, once you start your engines you can’t stop them.

Slink has decided to switch things up. For the first time in Blood Drive history, the racers will be headed through the Savage Land. But not to fear, as long as they don’t apply their brakes, they’ll be fine. Their cars have been rigged to shut down for ten minutes if they so much as think about slowing down.

Too bad that old adage about wanting what you can’t have still holds true. It takes no time at all for nearly all of the competition to brake, swerve, or stop for some reason or another. Resulting in lots of explosions–human explosions.

Grace and Arthur aren’t immune from mistakes, and it’s only a matter of time before they’re surrounded by the sexiest road bike hoard in dystopian America.

“Welcome to Majora,” their leader Caroline tells the captives as she takes them through the hallowed gates of the former Wet Canyon resort and spa.

In Majora, ladies are treated like the Queens they are, so Grace is whisked off for a day of pampering. Arthur, on the other hand, is tossed in a cage. There is only one thing the ladies of Majora need from men, and they have devised a less than pleasant way to take it … At least they get all the beer they want.

Domi and Cliff–everybody’s favorite murderous mates–are fighting again. They may love each other deep down, but the blood drive has really taken a toll on their relationship. When they inevitably get captured by the hoard, Domi takes it as an excellent excuse for a me-time out.

Meanwhile, Officer Chris Carpenter is continuing the fight against Heart Enterprises from the inside. His mission to get into the Hall of Secrets may have been successful, but that leads to another dead end with nauseous consequences. At least now we know that Aki has control over more than Carpenter’s …err…censored bits.

Grace may appreciate the warm Majora welcome, but she just wants to find her sister. Unfortunately, it looks like she has. Sister Karma was a leader in the women’s prison uprising, but she fell in the fight. Without her sister as a driving force, what does Grace have to race for?

This is a silly fun episode filled with wacky concepts and one-liners that shouldn’t be missed. I mean, how many other shows have dialogue like “All we gotta do is jizz for it”?

There was one moment of disconnect between myself and the writers this week. It came when Julian Slink, while speaking with his Heart superiors, made the most offensive, egregious comments about the Oxford comma. Unnecessary? This Chicago Manual of Style-user thinks not!

Rating: 3.5/5